WHAT A VISIONARY DAD DOES - VOL II ISSUE 10
Today is our 40th Wedding Anniversary!
Where there is no vision [no redemptive
revelation of God], the people perish; but he who keeps the law [of God, which
includes that of man]—blessed (happy, fortunate, and enviable) is he. Proverbs 29:18 Amplified
Do you have a vision
for your family? I remember when the Lord taught me how important
the process of developing, conveying and protecting a vision really is. Here’s the story.
In
February 1989, we moved to Merriam, Kansas, just southwest of Kansas
City. I had started a new job at Hallmark Cards as the corporate environmental
protection administrator. While living there I had about a 15-minute commute to
Crown Center, Hallmark’s headquarters, downtown.
Hallmark’s
founder, Mr. J.C. Hall, had died in 1976 and the company was for the first time
being operated by non-family management. It was rapidly diversifying and seemed
to have lost the original vision and mission of the founder. So, a large team
of long-term employees was commissioned to “find the company’s roots” and recapture
the original vision.
The
team studied Hallmark’s 78-year history and many of Mr. Hall’s writings.
After a couple of years’ work they developed a six-part mission or vision
statement and posted it throughout the company. All employees were expected
to “get in step” with the vision.
But
because the employees were such a diverse community and Jesus wasn’t the
cohesive element, the “vision-thing” didn’t work too well.
At
the same time this effort was going on at Hallmark, I attended a “Dad,
the Family Shepherd
Conference.” The passion of speaker Dave Simmons, a former football player, was
helping dads catch a vision for fatherhood.
I
was impressed with the questions he asked concerning the future: “If you could
listen in on your great-great-great-great grandchildren a couple of hundred
years from now, would they be talking about Jesus? Would they be passionately
in love with the Savior? What would/could you do to influence their lives so
far into the future? Are you giving your children a sense of destiny?”
Those
questions got me to thinking about our eight children (this was before Anna Grace
was born). What am I doing? I was praying with their mother every day, we were
home-educating[1], we tried to consistently discipline,
we loved to laugh together, we curtailed the television viewing and employed
other strategies. I was excited about all of the things we were doing, but
surely where was the vision for future generations?
What does being a Talley mean? Is there a special mission for our family?
As I mulled over these things in the weeks
following, I decided that the first thing I had to do was prayerfully develop
the family vision/mission statement. I started with a blank sheet paper and
began to jot down what ideals we valued. It was really just a long list of
Scriptures that I had memorized and on which I had meditated. Gene Warr and Jim
Kennedy are the guys who started me memorizing scripture 15 years earlier. The
only problem was the list had more than 50 concepts on it. I began to group the
issues/ideals under headings like prayer, witnessing, discipleship, family,
etc. It seemed I was stuck. I had been working on this idea alone but decided
at this point to include my brother Randy. After all, he had a degree in
communications and a career in public relations. He was excited about the
project. So I sent the long list to Randy and over the next couple of months we
worked on several versions of the vision statement. Eventually we met with all
our siblings for input and critique.
Sometimes when emphasizing meaningful scriptures
it is easy to leave the impression that the rest of the Bible is not as
important. But I never want to give that impression either directly or
indirectly. All Scripture is inspired by God and is profitable for doctrine (defining
the road), for reproof (warning when we get off the road), for
correction (how to get back on the road), for instruction in righteousness
(how to stay on the road) and that the man of God may be adequate, equipped
for every good work.[2]
Ultimately
we came up with the following:
We
recognize
- That love is richly
expressed through creativity, resourcefulness and industry [3].
- That learning is valuable,
especially the pursuit of God’s will through His Word, and that developing
character is the chief object of learning [4].
- That hospitality is the
practical expression of the lordship of Christ in my life [5].
- That raising children is a
privilege, not a duty, and that a heritage of Godly sons and exceeds above
any occupation in benefits, character-building challenge, and rewards [6].
- That patriotism is
practically expressed when the worth of the individual, friend or enemy,
is regarded as paramount, and when each of us seeks to fulfill our
individual responsibility [7].
- That conforming to God’s
standards and not the world may bring suffering, but God is working out His will in our lives, even through tough
times [8].
Now
all we needed was a crest or symbol to typify the vision. Although Tina
and I had looked for Talley family crests from Wales where our family is
supposed to have originated, the only thing we found was a few emblems
unrelated to what we held as central family beliefs. You know – the
ubiquitous medieval shield with lions, goats, etc. on them. None really
struck us as able to relate our shared family ideals.
This
brings me to the third thing that influenced the vision. It occurred while
I was on a business trip. I was flipping through the airline magazine and
came across an advertisement for items marked with “your company’s logo” –
watches, ink pens, ball caps, etc. It was on that plane during early 1990
that the idea emerged. I don’t remember the origin or destination of that
flight but I really believe the idea was from the Holy Spirit.
Could
a new family crest, bearing the symbols and representing the ideals we share as
a family become a rallying point? If it were emblazoned on t-shirts and coffee
mugs and jackets, would it become a symbol of shared identity (which we
wanted), or a point of pride (which we hope to avoid!)?
Collaborating
with family and several artists, we came up with the following crest. We make a
careful point to call it a “crest” (which is about vision) and not a “logo” (which is about sales). Each illustration
symbolizes one of the six statements in the vision.
That
Christmas we had gave out posters of the Vision. We also had sweatshirts
silk-screened with the new crest for each person in the greater family, about
27 of them, at that time. Since then our crest has been brandished on diplomas,
watches, rings, polo shirts, and door plaques to name a few.
So
what does it mean to you?
Please
notice that each of the value statements is squarely centered on Scripture and
character. Although the words ‘prayer’, ‘witnessing’, or ‘discipleship’
are never mentioned the vision is none-the-less oozing with them. We have
attempted to make these ideals the central focus of our lives and the more than
37 years of parenting and home education. Our deepest desire is that all
our children, grandchildren, indeed all future generations, would prize genuine
love, learning, hospitality, children, patriotism, and suffering.
As they grew up, we told each of our children (to tell to all of the future generations), “although we would like to make the decision for you to follow Christ, only YOU can do that. I am looking forward to being reunited with you or meeting you for the first time in heaven (for those born after we're gone). What will you do with Jesus? For eternity’s sake, BE THERE!”
There are many other ways that you could share your vision and thereby encourage your children to follow Christ and God’s plan for their lives. Dad, are you up to the challenge?
I'd like to hear about how you are passing along Christ's vision for your family...please send me your ideas..
THIS IS WHAT A VISIONARY DAD DOES!
Footnotes:
[1] Advanced Training Institute
[3] I Corinthians 13, Ephesians
5:15-17, II Thessalonians 3:10,
[4] Joshua 1:8, I Timothy 3:16-17, Psalms
119:9-11, Jeremiah 9:23-24
[5] Matthew 28:18-20, James 2:1-4 LB, I
Peter 4:9 LB, My Heart Christ’s Home – NavPress
[6] Psalms 127:3-5, Deuteronomy 6:6-9,
Ephesians 6:4
[7] Romans 12:9-21, Colossians 3:23-24,
Colossians 1:28-29 JB Phillips Version
